Do you remember the occasional visiting speaker ‘assemblies’ at elementary school in the 1970’s or 1980’s, into the early 1990’s?
I was fascinated at how these speakers could present information so comfortably, so confidently, and often wondered,’How did they get like that?’
It never occurred to me that it was learned, or a job, or a choice–I thought they just had a natural way, exclusive information, and an elite invitation. I was mesmerized by each word, tracking every move as they strolled left and right across the stage, casually sharing messages that sounded to my naive ears like such great wisdom about the most mundane topics:
- good nutrition
- oral hygiene
- long-term benefits of playing outside daily
- how to best study for tests
I felt it in my core that one day I would be on stage speaking to children about something equally important!
They often shared words or messages I hadn’t heard at home.
There is a small window of time to positively influence children before they have too much negative lived experience to benefit from any exposure or information that builds self-confidence. And if that window is missed, or shattered, life can be stifled beyond hope…
Later in that same elementary school assembly era, I recall being publicly embarrassed by a teacher for an out-of-turn (yet accurate) vocal fact-sharing.
Once the natural confidence of youth gets shut down, it can be difficult to rebuild self-esteem, learn how to make wise choices, and to take actions that not only feel good but that bring about personal improvement and positive social impact.
After just one confidence shut-down in elementary school, other assembly presentations meant to boost resilience and increase confidence had no influence on me, like D.A.R.E. (Drug Abuse Resistance Education) & Just Say No campaigns, for example. I was smoking, drinking, drugging and sexing–under the radar albeit safely as far as my teenage brain saw it–avoiding needle drugs and steering clear of felonious boys.
Now, with the hindsight and conscious awareness of a healing, expanding adult, I see clearly how the decades of being alive butliving small was certainly not a fair trade-off for any confidence shut-downs in my youth (whether they originated externally or internally.)
Looking back, it seems like at that age or time when I needed those mesmerizing, inspiring speakers the most, school assembly presentations fell away and were being replaced by off-campus conferences for educators instead of students.
I have trouble wrapping my head around the fact that an incident from 50 years ago could have anything to do with my underlying ‘lack mentality’ or have somehow kept me from following my dream to publish a book or travel or speak on stage to students. Seriously?!
When the internet began global distribution of information in the early 2000’s, the game changed entirely for how students got exposed to meaningful messages.
During this flood of technology, I was holed-up in a hospital room vastly preoccupied with a multitude of medical things. The up-and-coming technology presented itself as more of a welcome distraction than a necessary tool. I am by no means a Luddite, but looking back on those days I see how I adapted slowly and had to self-learn many of the basics of computing and communicating through this new worldwide medium–no wonder there was little confidence!
What does it take to rekindle the visions of youth? To share something meaningful-to-you (and likely valuable to others) without being ridiculed, shamed, or punished for speaking your heart?
If I’ve learned anything about confidence, it’s that it’s never too late to do great things.I’ll spare you pages of examples of late-in-life greatness (except my favorite: Louise Hay began Hay House publishing when she was 60 years old!)
That makes me smile! Consider smiling, anytime you take a breath on this Earth is the right time for a little smile. And another exaggerated inhale-exhale cycle!
It’s true, a residual feeling of self-doubt remains with me from elementary school despite decades of cultivating skills to raise my efficacy for self-confidence <sigh> but today I feel a slight smile forming on my lips…
…just like happiness is a choice, I’m feeling the stirrings of the possibilities available with choice. Could it really be that simple?
Confidence is a choice.
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